Sunday, August 10, 2003
occupational hazards
when you grow up you often think of yourself as having a certain job. when i was a little girl there was nothing i wanted more than to be a waitress. i wrote paper menus. the name of my fine establishment, "The Golden Eagle." i served loads of pasta dishes. i couldn't wait to balance a silver tray on one hand and pour pitchers of water. it's funny, i still wouldn't mind being a waitress.
i also thought about being an acrobat. i liked the idea of flying and the sequined outfits were just a plus. it looked like a lot of fun. i never did gymnastics growing up, maybe i should have.
there was a brief time when i wanted to be a playboy bunny. i didn't know anything about having sex with hugh hefner, but the magazine did appeal to me. i had never seen one, but i'd heard of them from other sources. i DID live in a neighborhood of all boys. i'm sure they had some stashed under their mattresses. perhaps it was my tendency to lift my shirt for them. flash the boys. i was only ten, so it wasn't like there were breasts, just promises for the future. i remember my next door neighbor asking me to do it. forcing me. i remember yelling no several times and his mother walking out of the house. i don't remember what he said but i knew he was wrong.
my love for dave coulier made me an avid fan of comedy. i knew i was as good a comic as sinbad. he stole one of my jokes. i never got farther than saying i wanted to be the next ellen. but less gay.
boys with mullets fascinated me in the 8th grade. jaromir jagr's especially. i wanted to be the next woman in the NHL. i almost applied to the University of Toronto and went to a specialized high school there. nevermind i didn't know how to ice skate. i used to practice with my best friend in her room with street hockey equipment. i thought i was pretty good. watch out BELFOUR.
then i had a band. we didn't actually play instruments but we dreamed about it. some of our names were Corgan, Boxite and then finally Siva. they were all my ideas. i had a new cooler name for myself, Jaide. i don't think we would have made it. there is no way i wanted to be called jaide for as long as we were not famous.
now, i'm a writer. the job that never goes away. anyone can say they are a writer, but even your best tries are mediocre. i know there is too much competition for me to stand out, but i'd still like to be on the spine next to all the other Reagans.
P.S. if you're ever walking around and you see a record store called a haus. it might be me. [insert city name] record haus. but by then things might have changed.
¶ 11:20 PM
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when you grow up you often think of yourself as having a certain job. when i was a little girl there was nothing i wanted more than to be a waitress. i wrote paper menus. the name of my fine establishment, "The Golden Eagle." i served loads of pasta dishes. i couldn't wait to balance a silver tray on one hand and pour pitchers of water. it's funny, i still wouldn't mind being a waitress.
i also thought about being an acrobat. i liked the idea of flying and the sequined outfits were just a plus. it looked like a lot of fun. i never did gymnastics growing up, maybe i should have.
there was a brief time when i wanted to be a playboy bunny. i didn't know anything about having sex with hugh hefner, but the magazine did appeal to me. i had never seen one, but i'd heard of them from other sources. i DID live in a neighborhood of all boys. i'm sure they had some stashed under their mattresses. perhaps it was my tendency to lift my shirt for them. flash the boys. i was only ten, so it wasn't like there were breasts, just promises for the future. i remember my next door neighbor asking me to do it. forcing me. i remember yelling no several times and his mother walking out of the house. i don't remember what he said but i knew he was wrong.
my love for dave coulier made me an avid fan of comedy. i knew i was as good a comic as sinbad. he stole one of my jokes. i never got farther than saying i wanted to be the next ellen. but less gay.
boys with mullets fascinated me in the 8th grade. jaromir jagr's especially. i wanted to be the next woman in the NHL. i almost applied to the University of Toronto and went to a specialized high school there. nevermind i didn't know how to ice skate. i used to practice with my best friend in her room with street hockey equipment. i thought i was pretty good. watch out BELFOUR.
then i had a band. we didn't actually play instruments but we dreamed about it. some of our names were Corgan, Boxite and then finally Siva. they were all my ideas. i had a new cooler name for myself, Jaide. i don't think we would have made it. there is no way i wanted to be called jaide for as long as we were not famous.
now, i'm a writer. the job that never goes away. anyone can say they are a writer, but even your best tries are mediocre. i know there is too much competition for me to stand out, but i'd still like to be on the spine next to all the other Reagans.
P.S. if you're ever walking around and you see a record store called a haus. it might be me. [insert city name] record haus. but by then things might have changed.
¶ 11:20 PM
|
