when should i listen to the boys?

i remember when just the light touch of the cute cashier's fingers on mine would make me melt. make me fall apart. make me piece myself together in the parking lot. then it got harder and harder to get that feeling back. it had to be holding hands. hugging tightly. hand on my thigh. hand on my breast. kiss on my neck. hand through my hair.

more and more specific.

like i was becoming numb.

so i stopped.

and i started to miss the compliments about my soft skin. how russell told me i had a nice nose so he wouldn't fall into the category of normal boy. that the only compliments i got on my eyes were from women. that i had pretty legs with small ankles. and my white white skin. wishing i had freckles but still receiving compliments. and that i had beautiful breasts.

then someone told me i had gorgeous hands.
then someone else.
than another.

so when i handed my cash to the cashier i made sure to brush his hand with my own.
which made him smile
wink
and made me tingle again. 
¶ 1:18 PM |