absolutely falling apart

i am not going to make it!

this college thing has got me way down. i honestly sit and think about how i'm not going to be able to make it through an entire year of school work and stressful situations. i mean this is not a normal situation, this is me having a complete breakdown (sophomore year of college style). i haven't been on my medication for 8 days & it's definitely making a difference. i'm falling apart.

yesterday, i saw Garden State and i was disappointed. i laughed, and cried and cried. i thought there moments of sheer brilliance in the script, and there were way too many points that hit home with me. but, i can't really enjoy any movie that has a woman carrying around a dead hamster. seriously, not funny!

i guess that movie started making me think i can't make anyone happy & i'm a huge disappointment to everyone & i have no friends & at least when he goes home he has some stoner friends to hang out with and i have no one & etc. i walked out of the theater in tears. i just don't want to be this way anymore. i cannot pull myself together.

why would anyone want to be around someone that is never happy and can't fix herself and has to take medication because she is so messed up? i haaaaaaaaate it. 
¶ 1:42 PM |