do good

i think i've done a lot of terrible things to people over the last semester, i've become such a nark! i had a run in with an awful security guard that called me passive aggressive & he can no longer work in my dorm. honestly, he wouldn't sign my boyfriend in properly and his job is ridiculously easy. but apparantly, this same security guard is well-known by emerson public safety for causing a ton of trouble -- so perhaps i don't feel so bad afterall. even if one of the other students came & talked to me about him and was like, "do you really want him to be fired?" i don't know -- i was a bit biased as the security guard not only smelled bad (like he hasn't showered in days) but was really creepy! although, i'm not someone to make a big deal if a big deal shouldn't be made. so, i was just doing my job as an emerson desk receptionist by reporting him for not doing his job. oh well.

& then another desk incident happened this saturday, where the boy (who just happens to be an RA) didn't show up for his shift. i probably wouldn't have minded so much if this was his first time, but this was the 4th time he had not shown up. it was just really aggrivating because i can't go around calling people at 10am to sit the shift, i'm basically stuck sitting 5 hours in a row (7am to 12pm) with only 3 hours of sleep. i ended up calling the desk cordinator and leaving a message with her telling her about it -- she has known about the previous incidents obviously & even helped me out in the past. so i just sat there with an angry look on my face reading Lizard by Banana Yoshimoto. finally, 20 minutes before the end of my second shift, the boy comes down looking really sad & says to me, "well, if it makes you feel any better, i lost my job" -- & i guess he can't be an RA anymore. i guess some ultimatum had been set if he missed anymore shifts or slipped up something he would lose his job. i felt really bad, just the look on his face. i don't know -- there are bad & good RAs and i don't really know if he was a good one or not, but he neglected his desk sitting job, which is part of the RA experience. i don't know if he's done anything else -- he's not my RA and i don't know the dorm gossip, but i do feel bad for the fellow. i don't think i could have stopped it from happening by not calling. he obviously felt really bad and even sat the last 20 minutes of the shift. poor lad.

i guess i wish people would do what their supposed to do. i think if you are a caring & considerate person, people definitely have more tolerance if you mess up. but even the nicest people get fed up with empty apologies. i'm sick of being stepped on as an individual, so i'm a bit heavy on the authority brakes. i take what i do seriously (or as seriously as humanly possible) and do what i can to help everyone else out. i just can't help but feel a bit bad about the incidents. nothing too heavy on my conscious, but it is there.

trust me, i'm not goody two shoes. this isn't high school anymore & i break as many rules as i can -- the secret is not to get caught!  
¶ 1:07 PM |